The O'Reilly Refractor

[topaz]

Dear Mr. O'Reilly:

Having heard so much about your recent comments about Michelle Obama, I was very grateful to learn I was misinformed.  Knowing that you do not yet want to go on a lynching party against her is a deep relief to me and, I am sure, many if not most other white Americans.  It is pleasing and humbling to know that in this day and age, lynching is no longer the immediate response to Negro recalcitrance, but has become a last resort, to be employed only when all other options have failed!

Truly, it is a proud day for America!  No reasonable person could possibly disagree, and it is astonishing indeed that Michelle Obama does not share your pride at the diminished popularity of lynching.

Now that you have made yourself clear on this subject, I am hoping that you can also clarify some additional matters:

• In your opinion, does the yellow peril still warrant the issuance of Jap hunting licenses?
• Does it make sense at this time to stock up on crosses and gasoline, or should we wait until we are 100% sure that they are warranted?
• Would you support the construction of concentration camps for Jews who do not admit to being wholly proud of their country?  Failing that, how about at least some yellow stars?

I am sure that you have received some negative feedback from so-called liberal agitators.  Please do not be alarmed; I understand that no one plans to act in retaliation unless they have complete and total proof that you are as much of a dingbat bastard as you sound.

Yours in solidarity,
qwrrty