twaddle

[topaz]

This is my daily semi-demi-irregular Twaddle feed.  If you want to read my Twats directly you can go to biteme.org.

• 09:41 a collection of fully orchestrated, lushly-arranged classic torch songs
• 09:43 @megazopolis: similar to, or a return of, the tracking powers of Dawnstar!
• 09:57 @carmcarm3 Da helmet head was totally worth it!
• 10:42 I read a book.
• 11:15 @johanngranados Coworker says Digsby works except it steals login sessions from web browser
• 12:07 @_laertesgirl sure he will be in like 5 yrs
• 12:54 I realized today that I'm not a Super Hero or a Power Ranger but an ordinary human with a great capacity. I still need to act realistically.
• 13:22 That was a really boring book.
• 13:41 @sake1derful Mmmmmm gooood!
• 14:08 just had a poop.
• 14:31 @AntiBucks Uhm. Waldo has a geriatric hippy fetish.

Comments

how you can tell I am secretly nine

[moominmolly.livejournal.com]

...14:08 still has me giggling.

So yeah, that's what they all look like to me, too. I nearly skipped this post because I can't read twitter-in-lj; I've trained myself to just fail to see it. But then the word "poop" caught my eye, overruling my brain's anti-twitter rule. Good thing! By which I mean "bad", except that I liked this post.

Re: how you can tell I am secretly nine

[kcatalyst.livejournal.com]

POOP!

I need to have another kid soon so I can prolong the life stage where people don't think it's that weird that I use terms like poopyhead.

Re: how you can tell I am secretly nine

[qwrrty.livejournal.com]

Once again, poop saves the day!

Re: how you can tell I am secretly nine

[alanj]

Re: how you can tell I am secretly nine

[qwrrty.livejournal.com]

I may just have to start reading Penny Arcade now.

[wotw]

Good thing I took a second look before defriending you.

[qwrrty.livejournal.com]

I felt sure that my judicious use of the word "twat" would save me.

[ratatosk.livejournal.com]

This makes me very happy. :)

I wish my friends page were full of stuff like this, but it's not easy to write that sort of thing idiomatically.

A+!

[qwrrty.livejournal.com]

To be honest, I cheated. There's no way I could write that much non sequitur off the top of my head. Much of it is copied off randomly selected entries from the Twitter public feed (http://twitter.com/public_timeline).

At first I actually planned to capture several hours worth of the public feed and use a Markov chain to generate random text from it. But that was really just too much work for a one-off joke. Even for me.

[khedron.livejournal.com]

*Clicks on Twitter public feed link*
*Sees 4th entry from top (at moment) suggesting "Tweeple should add 'Rod' as their middle name to show support for [Blagovich]"*
*Runs screaming*

[lhn.livejournal.com]

Extra points (from me, at least) for the Legion of Super-Heroes reference.

[penk.livejournal.com]

Hahah. You funny. I kill you last.

[blk]

topaz+++++

[concrete.livejournal.com]

@qwerty: I enjoyed it, thanks! What do you think of ShareThis and other personal aggregators?

[qwrrty.livejournal.com]

I avoid them AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE!

[kcatalyst.livejournal.com]

Liar. There were no twats fed in that whole post!

[qwrrty.livejournal.com]

This is totally a family-friendly post, buddy. You'll have to go over to another filter for that.

[docstrange.livejournal.com]

They weren't even tweaked as far as I could tell.

Twuly.

[dbang.livejournal.com]

Mine was, what's your problem?

[sine.livejournal.com]

thank you. that was awesome.

[hammercock.livejournal.com]

*gigglesnort* AWESOME.

[ronebofh.livejournal.com]

Word.

[vito-excalibur.livejournal.com]

*hearts you*