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Following our introducing the kids to Doctor Who:
(at work, my phone rings)
Me: Hello?
Quinn (on phone): Are you my mummy?
(at work, my phone rings)
Me: Hello?
Quinn (on phone): Are you my mummy?
while you enjoyed a life of ease
May. 21st, 2010 04:29 pmEllen: "After you've done that, Dad will take you out and show you where the compost pile is."
Morgan: ...
Morgan: "Why?"
Ellen: "So then you can take the compost out!"
Morgan (dubiously): "Why would I want that?"
Me: "It's all the rage! Everybody loves the compost pile!"
Morgan: "Great. You do it."
Me: "I already do it. I just like sharing the wealth."
Morgan: "I don't want your millions, mister."
Morgan: ...
Morgan: "Why?"
Ellen: "So then you can take the compost out!"
Morgan (dubiously): "Why would I want that?"
Me: "It's all the rage! Everybody loves the compost pile!"
Morgan: "Great. You do it."
Me: "I already do it. I just like sharing the wealth."
Morgan: "I don't want your millions, mister."
"I am the sneaky ninja! You do not see me. You do not hear me. You do not smell me. You do not taste my butt."
Quinn: Do you know what I'm going to get for Christmas? A box of TOOLS!
Me: You're what?
Quinn: With an AXE and a SAW!
Me: Exactly how do you think this is going to happen?
Quinn: I'm going to put it on my list! And Santa knows what you want!
Ellen: Quinn, you already have a toy axe and saw.
Quinn: I mean a REAL one.
Ellen and me: ...
Quinn: And batteries! And a CHAINSAW!
Ellen: Has daddy been showing you The Shining?
Me: You're what?
Quinn: With an AXE and a SAW!
Me: Exactly how do you think this is going to happen?
Quinn: I'm going to put it on my list! And Santa knows what you want!
Ellen: Quinn, you already have a toy axe and saw.
Quinn: I mean a REAL one.
Ellen and me: ...
Quinn: And batteries! And a CHAINSAW!
Ellen: Has daddy been showing you The Shining?
an a little child shall lead them
Mar. 12th, 2009 08:18 pmMorgan proclaimed this evening that it seems like everyone is trying to make it harder to search the Internet. "Because every time you search for something," he observed, "you just get about a hundred -- blog posts or something, and all kinds of stuff that doesn't even have anything to do with your keywords!"
"I'm pretty sure it's not that they're trying to make it harder to search the Internet," I said, "but that's definitely one of the results."
"Why do people even do stuff like that?" he demanded. "Why do people post all that stupid stuff?"
"Everyone thinks they have something to say," I said, "It's just that most of them don't have anything interesting to say."
"Those people aren't smart enough to post things on the Internet," he said with a snarl.
"I'm pretty sure it's not that they're trying to make it harder to search the Internet," I said, "but that's definitely one of the results."
"Why do people even do stuff like that?" he demanded. "Why do people post all that stupid stuff?"
"Everyone thinks they have something to say," I said, "It's just that most of them don't have anything interesting to say."
"Those people aren't smart enough to post things on the Internet," he said with a snarl.
Morgan's book project is to design a book jacket for one of the books on their reading list, including cover illustration, author bio, summary, and reviewer blurbs. Tonight he was writing the blurbs.
Morgan: How do you spell "Hillary?"
Dad: H-I-L-L-A-R-Y.
Morgan: How do you spell "Clinton?"
Dad: <looks at him>
Morgan: What?
Dad: C-L-I-N-T-O-N.
Morgan: Okay, thanks. Do you want to see what I'm--- actually, no, maybe it'll be better if you're not expecting it.
Dad: Right, good thinking.
The blurbs on the Morgan edition of A Wrinkle In Time:
"The coolest thing since electing was invented." --Hillary Clinton
"I felt more excited when I read this book than when I invented the lightbulb." --Thomas Edison
"This book was an EXPLOSION!" --The Big Boom Book Business
"This book was gripping." --Spiderman
"This book was as good as my candy." --Willy Wonka
Morgan: How do you spell "Hillary?"
Dad: H-I-L-L-A-R-Y.
Morgan: How do you spell "Clinton?"
Dad: <looks at him>
Morgan: What?
Dad: C-L-I-N-T-O-N.
Morgan: Okay, thanks. Do you want to see what I'm--- actually, no, maybe it'll be better if you're not expecting it.
Dad: Right, good thinking.
The blurbs on the Morgan edition of A Wrinkle In Time:
"The coolest thing since electing was invented." --Hillary Clinton
"I felt more excited when I read this book than when I invented the lightbulb." --Thomas Edison
"This book was an EXPLOSION!" --The Big Boom Book Business
"This book was gripping." --Spiderman
"This book was as good as my candy." --Willy Wonka
what tofurkey is really made of
Nov. 23rd, 2007 08:08 amWe are doing Thanksgiving this year a day late so that my uncle's family can join us, and are having a real turkey and a tofurkey so that ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
soundofdoom will have something to eat.
Last night I told the kids that we would be having Thanksgiving dinner at Granny and Grandpa's, and there would be both a real turkey and a fake turkey. A fake turkey?! they demanded. Yes, I said, a fake turkey too.
"Can we eat the fake turkey?" Quinn asked impishly.
"Sure, if you want to," I said.
His face passed into an expression of complete astonishment and a little horror. After a moment he asked, more somberly:
"Is it wooden?"
soundofdoom will have something to eat.Last night I told the kids that we would be having Thanksgiving dinner at Granny and Grandpa's, and there would be both a real turkey and a fake turkey. A fake turkey?! they demanded. Yes, I said, a fake turkey too.
"Can we eat the fake turkey?" Quinn asked impishly.
"Sure, if you want to," I said.
His face passed into an expression of complete astonishment and a little horror. After a moment he asked, more somberly:
"Is it wooden?"
heard recently in my household, vol 2
Oct. 12th, 2006 11:24 pmA recent posting by agaran reminded me of this story, which took place earlier this summer:
The scene: in the car, on the way to visitkeyne in MGH. The driver in front of me was taking a leisurely pace. I was unhappy with it and told him as much, until he wandered off onto a different road.
Quinn picked up the thread and started saying: "Dammit! Shit! Dammit! Fuck! Dammit!" or some such.
While I was struggling to find the right thing to tell Quinn, Morgan turned to him and said sternly: "Quinn! Those are grownup words."
And then, while I was struggling to find the right thing to tell Morgan, he went on: "And besides, that asshole already got out of our way!"
I gave up struggling and quietly promised myself a drink later.
agaran reminded me of this story, which took place earlier this summer:The scene: in the car, on the way to visit
keyne in MGH. The driver in front of me was taking a leisurely pace. I was unhappy with it and told him as much, until he wandered off onto a different road.Quinn picked up the thread and started saying: "Dammit! Shit! Dammit! Fuck! Dammit!" or some such.
While I was struggling to find the right thing to tell Quinn, Morgan turned to him and said sternly: "Quinn! Those are grownup words."
And then, while I was struggling to find the right thing to tell Morgan, he went on: "And besides, that asshole already got out of our way!"
I gave up struggling and quietly promised myself a drink later.
state of the quinn
Oct. 3rd, 2005 10:21 pmScene: at home.
Time: early in the evening on a warm late-September day.
Quinn: I'm hot! I want to take my shirt off!
Daddy: Okay, take your shirt off!
Quinn takes his shirt off and throws it on the floor.
A few minutes later:
Quinn: I need to put a shirt on! I'm cold!
Mommy: Okay, here's the shirt you just took off.
Quinn: No, not that shirt! That shirt is too hot!
Mommy and Daddy (puzzled): But you just said you were cold!
Quinn: I'm hot and cold!
There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. My son, in four words.
Time: early in the evening on a warm late-September day.
Quinn: I'm hot! I want to take my shirt off!
Daddy: Okay, take your shirt off!
Quinn takes his shirt off and throws it on the floor.
A few minutes later:
Quinn: I need to put a shirt on! I'm cold!
Mommy: Okay, here's the shirt you just took off.
Quinn: No, not that shirt! That shirt is too hot!
Mommy and Daddy (puzzled): But you just said you were cold!
Quinn: I'm hot and cold!
There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. My son, in four words.
